Tuesday, May 26, 2009

The Taming of the Cookie Monster

A few months ago, not long after my hiring, I began to pick out the "usuals" in the restaurant. Among the many, The Cookie Monster stood out most to me. Maybe it was my resentment of being detested by another human by no fault of my own, but for some reason, I felt like I should say something to this guy.

It was late, and there were only four hooters girls left in the restaurant, including the bartender, when the "Cookie Monster" walked in. I'd seen him at the bar regularly, but still had yet to experience any reasoning behind his "name." The last of my tables was getting up to leave and I was finishing up my side work, when one task brought me dangerously close to this man. He looked over and our eyes met. I stopped. Do I say something? Or do I ignore him like he's been ignoring me for the past three months?

"Hey there." I smiled, trying to look occupied.
"Hi!" He smiled back.
I stopped. Was he really acknowledging me right now? His hard face turned soft, like a nostalgic old man. We exchanged pleasantries. He explained to me that he liked the first three letters of my name because they were the same as the first three letters of his name. Any time I'd walk by him, he's start on about the most random of topics. He could tell me a fact about any place. Specific dates. Important politicians. Animals. Weather. Everything. This guy was about as smart as he was socially inept.

One day he asked if I liked hot sauce, now every time I see him, he has a huge bottle of hot sauce waiting for me. Kind of weird but it beats the evil eye. I'm just glad I get escorted to my car after work every night.


Anonymous said...

I wonder if the guy has Asperger's syndrome? It runs in my family, and a lot of this guy's characteristics sound familiar-- being socially awkward but scary-smart, unwillingness to make eye contact with strangers, extremely good memory for tiny details and facts, and even the hot-sauce thing! My 6-year-old son (who has Asperger's) only starts to really love seeing someone once he can associate them with a catch-phrase-- maybe the hot sauce thing has become that 'catch-phrase' for the way this guy thinks of you.

You mention bipolar disorder, and I know in female Asperger-types, BPD is often present.

Just a thought! :) I really am loving your blog, BTW! I found you through The Hooters Girl, whom I found through Psychotic Letters From Men, whom I found through Fugly Horse of the Day, whom I found through What Not To Crochet. Ain't the internets grand? ;D

--M.G., "The Perky Skeptic" (who cannot get her bloggerID to work this morning)

brit said...

Thank you so much for your insight! And thank you for reading! I find blogs that way all the time! It's amazing what you'll stumble onto :o) I'm definitely going to check out your blog :o)