No, unfortunately, I am not speaking of THE OFFICE, the best show in the world. I'm talking about my office. My less exciting place of work. Every day I am exposed to the idiots and the scum of the area. Today a girl brought in a copy of the renewal form for the Readers Digest. "This form is telling me I can pay my ticket for only ten dollars, but I already paid it!"
Oh really. Breathe. Just breathe.
"Ma'am, can I have your citation number so I may look up your citation?" I said, deciding to ignore her stupidity for the time being. "But this form says..." I stopped listening and my mind went blank for about thirty seconds. "That is a renewal form for the readers digest. It says Readers Digest. Where does it say anywhere anything about this police station." She didn't deserve to be protected from herself. "What? No, but this came with the other form..." "Yes. It probably came in the mail at the same time but that doesn't mean WE sent it to you. And that delinquent notice..? That probably crossed in the mail because you waited until the last day to pay it, right?" "Well, oh. I guess." "Have a nice day ma'am"
Not ten minutes later: "Is this the lost and found??" said a frantic, discheveled young man. "Well this is the police office but we do have a lost and ..." "Do you have any pants??" He cut me off. "Pants?" "Yes, I asked the other offices and they said to come to the lost and found here." His eyes jerked around the room before they landed on my again. Fuck you other offices. Fuck you. "Let me check, what color are they?" "I don't care, I just need some pants." Oh my god. "Sir, I can't just give you someone else's pants, even if we did have some." "I just need to borrow them!! I'll give them back!!!" Oh god. "Sure! I'll check for you!" "Thank you! You're the only one that knows what they're doing!" I ran into the back and sat there for about five minutes and came back out. "I'm sorry sir, unfortunately we don't have any pants. "
I'm a 21 year old Southern California college student and part time Hooters waitress with too much going on inside my head. I love my family, my friends, and my wonderful boyfriend despite how crazy they all make me. When extreme sports, art, and music don't cut it, I come on here to vent my frustrations or flaunt my happiness. So here it is. Vivaaa!!
Contact me at email@example.com
Please note that the views and opinions expressed herein are mine alone. They are not necessarily the views and/or opinions of Hooters Inc, Hooters of America Inc, or of any other Hooters affiliate. Hooters Inc, Hooters of America Inc, and other Hooters affiliates are in no way affiliated with, Caution: Blonde Thinking, and they do not endorse or support, Caution: Blonde Thinking. The same applies to any Police station or of any Officer.